Yippie....

Living with 1 boy is hard enough for me.. Now.. my other cousin came.. it means that I have to live with 2 boys.. aaarrrrggghhh...
what they do is playing computer game.. which is counter strike.. and they hi-jack my lappy..
what is the point of playing that kinda game?
yea whatever..
btw.. my other cousin.. he's just 1 year apart from me.. he lives in Bremen.. he's majoring in music.. guitar.. so.. he came yesterday.. and gosh his hair!!!!
now I knoe why I'm having headache.. I can't stand his hair!!!!!!!!

Btw.. I'm done with my 3rd semester.. yippie!!!!! Yesterday was like my last exam in this semester.. I don't give a damn if I get a good grade or not.. I'm so looking forward to seeing my sister.. I'm so friggin' in holiday mood.. but I still have to finish 1 more protokoll..

Ou.. these Lufthansa people will go on strike starting on Monday.. what the heck.. I'm so gonna kill those people if sumthin happens to my flight schedule..

gosh.. this song by Epik High is so freaking addictive.. I can listen to it like thousand times a day.. although I didn't understand.. but it just keeps playing in my head..
and the music video is out.. yuhuu.. it's ok actually.. not my fave.. but still.. I think it's so interesting.. the whole idea.. concept..
I like the part where Tablo (the guy) brushed his teeth.. haha...
so..here.. enjoy the video..



I don't know why.. but I'm soooo sleepy today.. Guess I'm off to sleep..

P.S.: "A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in." ~Robert Orben~

I'm so freakin' lazy..

I don't feel like studying anymore.. I'm bored.. I can't concentrate.. I'm so looking forward to holiday..
The only problem is.. I'm so not prepared for tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
help? anyone? aaaaaaaaaa....
ok..this is such a so-not-important posting..
ou.. I just found out that Obama is here.. hahaha.. what the heck is he doing here?
yea whatever..
better continue what I was doing before.. which was daydreaming.. hahahaha...


P.S.:“Discipline and concentration are a matter of being interested.” ~Tom Kite~

I only have 2 days left..

I'm not supposed to do this.. still have to continue studying.. but what to do.. I'm bored.. dammit.. I just remembered I haven't finished my protokoll..hihihi.. I really love to procrastinate.. So.. It seems like I can continue my organic lab.. it has nothing to do with the bloddy exam.. but.. there might be a possibility that I'll pass the exam with not-so-good-grade.. but whateva.. I don't give a damn.. But even If I still fail.. I won't get Maluspunkt (I don't know if there any English word for that..) I told Herr Lehmann about my problem.. so the problem is actually solved.. well..we'll see about that.. I still have 1 exam to go.. physical chemistry 2.. arrrgghh.. I'm so sick of studying.. I only have 2 days more.. and I'm wasting my time now.. great job!! but really after exam.. I'm so gonna hibernate.. I did actually last Sunday.. I took a nap for like 2 hours.. I slept as if I fainted.. really.. hahaha.. nothing much happened actually..

Ou.. on Saturday we went out.. well.. kinda farewell party for Debo.. my cousin's girlfriend.. she will be spend her next 6 months in Aachen.. doing her Diplom-arbeit-thing.. we went home real late.. and the next morning I had to go to early mass.. well.. not that early but still.. so there u go..the reason why I hibernated.. hihihi gosh..

Nose picking on saturday nite..

I'm really looking forward to holiday.. I can't wait to see my sis.. and cheesecake factory.. dammit! these kinda things really distract me.. arrrrrggghh.. ok Meta u have to focus!! U have to pass the exam.. better back to what I'm supposed to do.. which is studying.. oh shoot.. still have to analyze spectra.. (I'm listening to Sun Si Kyung.. Nice voice..)

P.S.: “Work is hard. Distractions are plentiful. And time is short.” ~Adam Hochschild~

antoher series of mental breakdown..

So.. I just found out that I didn't pass the bloody organic chem exam..
I'm kinda having a mental breakdown.. for sure.. but surprisingly.. it's not that bad..
for real.. when I saw the result and knew that I didn't pass.. I just thought.. yeah.. whatever.. I knew that I wouldn't pass the exam anyway..
well.. I do feel a bit disappointed.. I mean I failed for heaven's sake.. it's normal to be disappointed..
I even already thought of what I would do next if I didn't pass the exam..
I was thinking of send e-mail the professor for the make up exam..(err.. nachklausur in german..) since I won't be here on that day..
but then I was thinking.. the hell with it.. I'm so fine if I can't do organic lab 2 next semester.. I just feel like this semester was quite hectic.. well..really hectic.. at least for me..
I feel like I don't have life anymore because of the lab.. and I live so freaking unhealthily.. I don't have enough sleep.. I don't eat properly.. my friend always told me that I really looked so damn tired.. I become a caffeine-addict..
I don't hang out on weekends with my friends.. I don't chat anymore with my friend.. I used to be a msn-messenger freak.. I was always online.. but now...
really.. I don't know whether I'm happy with this kind of life..
I'm still young.. I still wanna have fun and enjoy my life..
if I think about it.. I always come to the same questions..
do I really want to study chemistry? am I happy with it? is this really what I wanna do? or am I just pretending that I like it?
ouu.. and there's a new question.. is chemistry really suitable for a clumsy person like me?
hmmm.. like always.. I never have the answers for these questions..
so.. I'm really in a deep thinking of what I would do next semester..
arrrrghhh.. my brain..my brain.. it tells me to stop thinking.. it really needs a rest..
I'll do the thinking tomorrow then.. (the procrastinator is back...)

so.. another video to share..
I was listening to this song the whole day..
the girl was in the same university as my sis.. hihihi..
probably I'd do the same thing as the girl did in the video after this..




P.S. : “Suicide is man's way of telling God, "You can't fire me - I quit." ~ Bill Maher~

Is this really goodbye??

Today I woke up with the same bad mood as yesterday.. because the first thing I remembered was the stupid mistake that I made yesterday.. way to go Meta.. -_-'
I really tried to kicked that bad mood away from me.. but it was really hard..

Today was also an important day.. Fina, the girl with unique hair and style, went back to Indonesia for good.. so I went to airport to say goodbye.. I really don't know.. should I be sad or happy? It's sad because she's no longer gonna be here with us.. she's no longer gonna fill our days with her cheerful personality with us.. we can't listen to her beautiful voice anymore..
but she's back to Indo for a really good reason.. (at least in my opinion it is..) She's gonna pursue her dream to study design.. I'm so proud of her.. and so envy her.. She's not afraid to decide.. "ok.. this is not what I want to do..It would be better if I go back and do what I really want.."
It is not an easy decision to make.. really.. I don't even have the guts to think about it..
I mean.. I hate every minute of my existence here.. I don't give a damn what people say.. I just hate being here.. I start questioning myself.. Is this really what I wanna do? Is chemistry the rite thing for me? Am I supposed to be here at the first place? Am I really happy with my decision?
Because sumtimes I feel like I'm just pretending to be happy.. or I'm just trying to look for happiness.. at least it's the only thing I can do.. *deep sigh*

ups.. what the heck am I doing? babbling about my problem.. I'm supposed to dedicate this post to Fina.. (with F and not V)
Who is Fina actually?? I met her in Studienkolleg for the first time.. I guess.. haha.. As I said she's the girl with unique hair.. and I really like her style too..how she dresses.. her big dork glasses.. and I won't forget her triangle scarf.. I remember.. one day she tried to explain how to make the scarf looks triangle when u wear it.. it was freakin' hilarious.. She's also very talented.. she sings real well.. she plays the guitar.. piano.. geez.. and she's really creative.. she's such a cheerful person.. she laughs a lot.. (it doesn't mean that she's crazy.. haha..well.. a bit.. ^^) she jokes around a lot.. that's why the atmosphere is so cheerful when she's around.. she also eats a lot.. but she's still slim and skinny.. I hate her for this.. it's sooo unfair!!!!!!! overall she's a really nice and fun person.. so glad to knoe and have a friend like u pina.. ^^

I'm gonna miss u pinaaa...

P.S.: “We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.” ~Frederick Keonig~

I'm so not in the mood of talking..

So.. I screwed my exam up.. I think I'm not gonna pass..
I dunno.. aaarrrrggghhh...
yea whateva.. I mean what can I do..
I really had bad mood today.. usually chocolate can cheer me up.. but not today.. I wonder why..
but it's good for the sake of my diet.. (ok.. now I sound like Julian haha..)

wanna share a video.. It's a music video from Epik High. The song's called Fan..
yups.. lately I listen to their music.. surprisingly.. I don't usually listen to this kind of music..
I dunno why.. but I kinda enjoy their music..

I like the idea of the video.. I knoe the girl is psychopath.. (sumtime I feel I'm a bit psychopath.. hahaha...) My fave part is when the girl washed the guy in a washing machine.. and the one when the guy tried to burn himself.. then the girl came with fire extinguisher.. but I don't really understand the ending tho.. but still.. I think the video is great..

P.S.: “Unhappiness does make people look stupid” ~Anatole France~

I hate working with bromine..

I only have 2 nights to get those spectro things into my head.. oh noooo... I'm so dead..
I actually wanted to finish my eugenol experiment.. but my plan always didn't go well.. we were running out of aceton.. and we had to wait until 2.. so i made another experiment, which involved bromine.. again.. I hate it.. but it hasn't finished yet..

that brown liquid is so disgusting.. yaps it's bromine

wonder why I'm so in the mood of writing my blog everyday.. yaps.. because I have to freaking study.. hahahahaha.. I'm such a procrastinator rite???
As I said.. I only have two nights.. not days.. nights.. I only can study at night.. and I'm wasting my time by writing so not important things here.. hahahahaha
question.. why the heck am I sleepy? I had coffee tho.. arrrrrggghhh..
I have to stay awake tonite.. at least until 1 or 2..
I'm really gonna look like a panda..

P.S.:"Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank." ~Alphonse Allais~

I hate spectroscopy..

What Your Taste in Music Says About You

Your musical tastes are upbeat and conventional. You are an easy going, optimistic person. Family and friends are very important to you. You enjoy caring for and helping other people. You thrive in a tranquil environment, and you do your best to keep things peaceful. You enjoy your life. You have your priorities straight.

What Does Your Taste in Music Say About You?

P.S. : look what I'm doing.. I'm actually supposed to study the damn spectroscopy.. and analyze my spectrum.. arrrrrrggghhhh....

The road trip of my life..

The Road Trip of Your Life

You see companionship and loyalty as what's most important in life. You live life at a fairly leisurely pace. You take time to enjoy the sweeter parts of life, even when you're busy. You're willing to take a few risks in life. You may not take the road no one travels, but you're happy to take the road less traveled. You tend to be a workaholic. You overwork yourself without ever realizing it and sometimes suffer the consequences later. In another life, you could have been a great artist. You trust your creative instincts enough to let them lead you.

The Road Trip Test

P.S.: Somehow it's quite true.. esp. the overwork-without-realizing-it-part.. and I could have been a great artist..hihihi.. should I quit being a chemistry student???

sick of studying..

I'm so sick of studying.. aarrrggggghhhh...

I have to..but I just don't feel like doing it anymore.. help!!!
how can I get rid of this laziness out of me??
It's late already.. and look what I'm doing.. I keep procrastinating.. until I realize.. I really don't have that much time.. then I start to panic..and I'm running out of breath.. or am I hyperventilating?
aaaarrrrggghhh.. I think I'm gonna be crazy real soon.. I don't think I have life anymore..
My life is only about studying..lab journal..another studying.. another lab journal.. (yes..those damn protokoll!!!!)
I even don't have enough sleep.. I'm gonna look like a panda real soon.. with a black circle around my eyes.. I need my beauty sleep.. or maybe I should say my baby sleep.. I need 10 hours sleep.. hahaha..

Somehow.. this picture reminds me of sumthing..

gosh.. it's this late already.. I really should stop now..


P.S. : “I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I'm awake, you know?” ~Ernest Hemingway~

I'm so stressed out...

I knoe.. I knoe.. it's been a while since I wrote.. yea rite.. define a while! I really don't have time.. organic lab is really wasting my time.. hahaha.. yea rite Meta.. just blame it to the lab.. It's me who decided to study chemistry.. so I come to a conclusion that being a blogger is not a really good idea for a chemistry student.. well at least for me.. I barely have time to write.. I even don't read anymore in train.. altho I do have an interesting book.. within a week I have spectroscopy exam.. and guess what? I don't understand it at all.. I repeat..AT ALL!!!!!!!!!!!! then the week after..in 2 weeks.. I have organic chemistry (again) part 2 exam.. and the reactions, that I have to learn are freakin a lot.. really they're like a lot.. then.. it's physical chemistry exam's turn.. yea rite.. the worst part is.. I still have lab..still have like 2 weeks.. OMG!!!! and I still have to do like 3 or 4 experiments.... I'm sooo stressed out.. I really don't know if I can make it.. dammit!! please people.. remind me..why on earth do I study chemistry?? why? why??????? I have to be in lab when the weather outside is nice.. it is always like that.. every time I don't have lab.. the weather is just bad.. but today I was thankful that I was in the lab.. for heaven's sake.. it was sooooo hot out there.. and our lab has air conditioning.. haha.. but the assistant's room was freaking hot.. I don't know how the assistants can survive there.. well.. I guess I knoe why they had bad mood.. hahaha.. so.. Indah now is in charge.. the problem is she only speaks english.. (and indonesian when she talks to me..;P) the other students only speaks german.. well they do speak english but not that fluent.. so they really have problem with the language.. I remember.. christian and julian asked me to be translator for them.. the problem was.. they talk at the same time.. I was so confused.. and now since we use both english and german (and indonesian sumtimes).. my brain sumtimes doesn't work that well.. yesterday christian asked me sumthing.. and I wanted to say wait.. my brain told me to say it in german.. but my mouth didn't listen to my brain.. oooh.. this is so confusing.. hahaha.. and now I really want to learn korean.. yea rite Meta.. keep creating a new problem! gosh.. I really shouldn't do this.. hahaha.. I'm such a procrastinator... ok.. I'm off..

I'm so stressed out..

P.S. :“Brain cells create ideas. Stress kills brain cells. Stress is not a good idea.”~Frederick Saunders~